Dog Eared and Left at the Bus Stop

Two horrific murders take place in a small home in England. The house becomes vacant and a University professor/paranormal investigator moves in to try and document ghostly doings with the help of her tech guy and the troubled new student from her class. Clive Barker’s Book of Blood is yet another disappointing adaptation of an amazing authors work.

I really wanted to like this movie. It started out really well, interesting story, likable characters. It then proceeded to turn into a sequel to Disney’s Haunted Mansion. When it came time to reveal actual, physical ghosts they were cartoony and ridiculousness which made it impossible to continue the suspension of belief.

The terrible choice on special effects turned what was otherwise a dark and eerie film into a terrible episode of Are You Afraid of the Dark. It doesn’t make a whole lot of sense. The few times that this film went with practical effects they were gruesome and well done, it was only in their heavy and poor use of CGI that completely assassinated this movie.

The scares are non-existent, the ghosts make you laugh out loud or vomit in embarrassment for whoever was responsible for them. They open up the movie with the main character captured for the marks on his skin and then flashback to the events leading up to that point, they then try to wrap up that initial story in the last 8 or 9 minutes of the movie.

I’ve lost my ability to put together paragraphs about this film, I just want to yell obscenities at the screen until I feel better about how boring and bad this movie was. Fuck.

Unless you are a Clive Barker adaptation completest, don’t even bother with this crap. I keep hoping someone will do a Clive Barker story justice but with the exception of Nightbreed it seems that Barker himself is the only one capable of bringing his work to screen properly.

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